Title: Only See You Word Count: 246 pgs
Genre: Contemporary Gay Romance
Blurb:“I might not be every gay man’s wet dream, but I always get a second look.”
Mal Copol knows who they are: Nonbinary. Awesome. Exhausted. They won’t change for anyone, but just once, they’d like to be the one with relationship potential, not the hookup. Also, not having to fight employers on who they are and how they present themselves would be nice. And while they’re at it, add not getting raised eyebrows at their high heels and tasteful makeup while discussing their latest rock-climbing trip to the wish list. Is that really too much to ask?
“Here I am at twenty-seven, embarking on life, version 2.0.”
Parker McWilliams is breaking free from the constraints of his former life and wife. He’s recapturing his zest to try new things and experience everything to the fullest, instead of the complacency he had fallen into over the past nine years. If one of those “new experiences” happens to be with a certain beautiful and intriguing nonbinary person, well, Parker’s just going to roll with it. Anything contrary to his past life is a good thing.
Mal and Parker keep surprising each other every time they meet. Despite their differences, neither has any interest in fighting their attraction. But when circumstances threaten to keep them apart, the couple must decide if that attraction is enough to overcome the obstacles they face.
My Review: Parker McWilliams has been trying to pick up the pieces of his life since he ended his marriage to his horrible Stepford wife Shelby. He packed everything and moved clear across to Colorado to move in with his gay cousin Zach. They have not always been the closest or seen eye to eye, but they both realize it was Shelby who was the problem all along. For the first time since he was 19, he is no longer under the shroud of Shelby’s control and influence. Parker has been meeting new friends and he has been reforming his self image all on his own. He is on his way to finding his true self.
On the day his cousin Zach moves out to live with his boyfriend Craig, Parker meets yet another new face. Mal Copol is one of Craig’s friends who is helping out. Mal identifies as non binary and uses ‘them, they’ pronouns. Parker is a bit confused at first and unknowingly offends Mal. Mal sets him ‘straight’ as they see that Parker is not trying to be offensive, he just doesn’t understand. Mal is intrigued by the sexy straight guy, but he knows it’s not meant to be so he sets his sights on Ben, Zach’s best friend and Craig’s current roommate.
When Mal and Ben’s date take a disastrous turn, Mal ends up taking home a drunken Ben. Mal is disappointed and a little bit upset that Ben would get so drunk. They call on Parker to help get Ben up the stairs. Parker willingly helps, but he is also upset on Mal’s behalf. He feels bad that his roommate made this sweet guy feel so crappy. Parker offers Mal coffee and one thing leads to another and before he knows it , he is pleasuring Mal. This is the most selfless and spontaneous that he’s ever been and it’s a great feeling. He is surprised at himself , since he has only ever been with one woman. Mal is blown away, they can’t belief that this sexy straight guy turns out to be slightly bent. They have never been with someone who treats them with so much care. However, they chalk it up as a one off experiment.
It isn’t until a dinner party a few weeks later when Mal sees Parker again. Mal is at an all time low after just losing yet another job due to his gender identity. Just being around Parker puts a spark in him. By the end of the night, they are getting hot and heavy in the backseat of Parker’s Volvo. For both of them, hottest sex ever…. until they are interrupted by a cop who gives them a warning. Parker feels like he’s living his teen years again in the best way, with all the fun ,spontaneity and frivolity that it brings.
Mal and Parker become even closer when they take a road trip for Parker’s father 60th birthday. Mal is on the journey as a distraction from Parker’s divorce. When they get there , Parker’s mother insistence on asking about Shelby drives him up the wall. However, it soon becomes clear that something is seriously wrong with her confused, muddled state. It hits Parker like a ton of bricks when his father explains that his mother has early onset Alzheimer’s. When they get back to their hotel room, Mal takes care of Parker helping him to relieve his tension. Their lovemaking is exquisite and something that is so so erotic and enlightening for Parker. There is laughter and playfulness, something they’ve both never experienced before. There is a definite connection between these two.
Their relationship progress nicely while they both realize they have a lot in common. They do lots of fun, outdoorsy activities and of course Mal takes lots of selfies. It is one of these pictures that would prove to be their downfall. Shelby sees one of the tags with Mal kissing Parker on the cheek and goes ballistic at one of their settlement meetings. Parker’s lawyer lets him know that she needs to check out Mal’s background so they can be on the offence. Mal is extremely upset about this as it doesn’t seem like Parker plans to fight for them. To top it off, Parker has been thinking to move back to help out with his mother’s illness. Mal is devastated, but he decides to let Parker be free to make his choices unencumbered.
Things are left unresolved between them and they both go their separate ways. Parker is trying to settle into a routine with his mom. In her lucid moments , they talk and she encourages him not to give up his life and go after Mal. It’s when Parker gets a chance to talk to her doctor who tells him that his mother could live for another 20 yrs while her condition slowly deteriorated. Parker realizes how selfish his father has been in manipulating and guilting him into becoming her permanent caregiver. When Mal has an accident while ice climbing, Parker rushes to their side.
Mal is ecstatic that Parker has come to be with them, but they’re not sure what it means. When Mal sees the vulnerability that shines through when Parker tells them that they mean the world, their heart leaps. Mal is overwhelmed with emotion that someone finally sees the true them. Parker accepts all of them and he is no longer afraid. He is ready to embrace his new identity and shout it to the world. Parker decides that for the new version of his life , he wants to live with Mal, loving him and exploring all the outdoorsy adventures they can find. With his mother’s blessing he gets her a living caregiver and move back to Colorado to his new loft with the love of his life, Mal. His divorce to the Stepford witch is final and he can embrace his freedom as Mal’s partner. I give this my ratings of 4- lose the underwear.